Since I just celebrated my 6th dating anniversary with Reese last week, I decided to share with you all six things that I have learned during the last six years. It has definitely been a long journey to get where we are but we have both grown together and separately in this life that God has given us together. I am so blessed to have him and cannot wait to learn more during our lives together.
1 // It is better with Jesus
Reese has always been going to church and worshipping Jesus. We have always gone to church together. But we had never really had deep conversations about Jesus, this life he has given us, beliefs we have, or anything else until maybe one & a half to two years ago. Reese and I have read the bible together, have gone to bible studies together, and have truly turned our relationship over to Him. And it has been so great since we have! We still have our hard times, temptation is still real, and we may take steps back from reading both together and separately but the Lord has our relationship in His hands and had definitely blessed us more than I ever thought He could. Jesus needs to become #1 in your relationship, even over your significant other. If He is, you will have a far better relationship than you would have without Him. Going through hard times with Jesus is so much easier because you can give it all to Him together and pray together. I thank Jesus everyday for the relationship and the godly man He has given me.
2 // Compromise
There is so many things that I would rather do than sit through a football game, basketball game... lets just face it sports in general, but I do it all be I love my man and it makes him happy. I have watched many shows I don't like and listened to a lot of his music, that doesn't appeal to me.. but I do it all for him. Compromise is such a big component of having a great relationship. You cannot always have what you want or make your boyfriend/girlfriend watch the movies you like. You have to be able and willing to go do things that don't appeal to you and might not be fun, but you do it all for love and to make your person happy. It shows that they want to be with you and are willing to do your favorite things with you.
3 // Communication
This is a hard thing for us girls, we believe that a man should just know what is on our mind.. but most of the time they have no idea that something is even wrong. Rather sitting there pouting or being mad/annoyed from something that your boyfriend may have said/done, it is a lot easier to just be open and talk to them about the problem. It can cause a whole lot less stress, tension, and fights in the relationship. It also lets him know that he can open up if he needs to talk about anything. A simple conversation can keep from a whole lot of arguments.
4 // Support
Girls, I cannot begin to explain to y'all how important it is to support your man. In the past I have always pouted or made Reese feel more bad than I have feel like he has my support. It is important that they know that we are aware of his/their accomplishments and hard times in life. A "good job" or an "I'm proud of you" could mean all the world to them because it lets them know that what they do gets acknowledged and isn't put aside or looked over. I have learned that letting Reese know that I see that he has worked hard and has done well is very important and can make his day when I notice.
5 // It is not all about you
This goes along with compromising in your relationship. Some days you need to sit down and be completely there for your significant other. You need to listen to them and help them through hard situations. Other times you need them there for you, to listen to you and to be able to lay your head on their shoulder. I have learned that I a lot of times talk so much about my problems and fears, and I am unaware of what he is going through or his needs. Ladies, being there for your boyfriend/husband is a huge thing because even though they are supposed to be big strong men (at least thats how Hollywood makes them out to be) they can be sad or down sometimes and need our ears. You do not always get to watch what you want or do what you want.
6 // You both need your independence
At the beginning, Reese and I were an hour away from each other, so every chance we got we wanted to see each other and spend quality time together. That, for me, was during high school and most girls my age were not in serious relationships, but were out with their girlfriends making memories. I loved that I got to make so many memories with Reese, ones that I will always have and am so grateful for, but there came a time when we did want our independence and were not always together (around when he started college) and I needed my girlfriends. I have come to find that being able to go out with your girlfriends and have a great night or go on vacation with them will only strengthen your relationship with your boyfriend. You need others in your life to be able to talk to and grow from. Don't get me wrong, I would spend everyday with Reese if I could, but being able to go to dinner with a friend is also very important to me too. Reese is definitely my best friend and the one who I go to for pretty much everything, but there are some things that only girls understand and that is definitely healthy.
"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast;
it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way;
it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing,
but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."
-1 Corinthians 13:4-8